9:30 am I grab that first beer
Empty stomach, empty soul
The mind machine clogged up
Trying to make sense
Of that which has no sense
Anger raging through me
Sorrow chasing it down
Mourning in full force
For losing what was not there
In the first place
10:30 am I grab that third beer
Drunk is setting in
A fabricated lifetime of
Tears parading down my cheeks
A cosmic hurt in my heart
That isn’t there and never was
I take a bite of
The eggs I love so much
But they aren’t real
An illusion to fill my
Nonexistent stomach
11:30 am I talk to my best friend
Staggering around the yard
Trying to explain
What I don’t understand
How do I tell her it is all bullshit
I am bullshit, she is bullshit
None of it matters
But it is all that matters
12:30 pm I learn how poop
Returns to Mother Earth
From the wide eyed 4 year old
So beautiful and innocent
So full of wonder
The wisest character in my story
For 2 hours we talk about
supercross man, truck man
His older girlfriend who is a girl
Otherwise he would have to say mangirlfriend
I learned of cookie butter
And whipped cream on an apple
I was shown step by step
How to make mud
And how to fill a hole
With that mud
I learned how jelly beans and m&m’s
Are different but the same
How brussel sprouts are
Not so much good
How Poppy likes the celery soup
So he takes it
But doesn’t like it
How the blueberries
Need the water
2:30 pm he leaves
to play In the sandbox
And I watch him
Intent on each grain
Focused – pure – joy
And I know right then that it is all
Simple – Perfect
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